Portrait of Jackie: Kit Ramsey
Jackie’s life was a struggle from the start. Born and raised in Kensington, her childhood was marked by sexual abuse and neglect. When, at age 14, she tried to end her own life by taking pills and cutting herself, she remembers an ambulance arriving and her mother saying, “Don’t get blood on my floor.”
“I thought that was all I was worth,” says Jackie, now 37, referring to a second suicide attempt.
Shunned by her family after she told them she was gay, Jackie found that narcotics like PCP, and later heroin and fentanyl, dulled her pain. For years, she moved between rehab facilities and the streets, getting into recovery and then starting to use again to cope with abusive relationships or losing loved ones.
Others struggling with substance use issues told Jackie she could get food and clothing at Prevention Point Philadelphia (PPP). She went, and realized she wanted to change her life.
“I was sick and tired of being sick and tired,” she says. “I was homeless, cold, being stolen from. Ridiculous... That’s not who I am.”
One day, a PPP case manager, Sarah, ran into Jackie outside. Sarah started connecting Jackie to medical and behavioral health services, and helped her develop healthy coping mechanisms. Jackie had heard she’d have to wait months, maybe years, to get into Beacon House.
“Sarah called here [Beacon House] every day,” Jackie said.
On Feb. 28, not long after Jackie had first expressed interest in Beacon, Sarah jumped on an opportunity to place Jackie at Beacon.
“Sarah comes out and says, ‘You’re going to Beacon House today.’ I was like, ‘Are you serious?’ I was relieved,” Jackie says.
In the months since then, Jackie’s addressed her long-neglected medical issues, including diabetes and infected wounds, and she utilizes PPP’s PrEP Clinic. Jackie says she feels a kinship with her new housing case manager at Beacon as well as other staff members, including LBGTQ staff who emphasize that there is nothing wrong with her because of who she chooses to love.
“Some people just work for a paycheck. I don’t think anyone is here [at PPP] just for a paycheck. They really want to help and they really care,” Jackie says. “Some of us are just in pain. We’re hurt. We need a little guidance.”
These are gifts from Beacon House that she never expected, she says. She would have been happy with simply food and shelter.
“Being able to sleep, knowing I’m safe inside these walls, is everything,” Jackie says. “I’m forever grateful. I don’t think, if I had not gotten here a year ago, I would be here today.”